The Carrot and the Stick Part 26 Wolf, Wizard, Fire, Golem releases in six days.

Chapter 25: Stuff Happens, Eadam is Stuffed and then Stuffs

Within the cook-pits, there were dangerous and deadly beasts. They were of course all head and currently being cooked. He was surprised at first, as the beasts were not upon spits, instead they hovered in smoke and fire, around which the cook-shamans were dancing. The flames and food bobbed in time with their dances.

Hmm, the stock of your spirit is a bit thin, but you’ll fill out well enough”

The speaker wore strips of lime green scaly leather, from which dangling hollow tubes of puce metal. Those purple-brown tubes produced a musical sound with each movement. This cook-shaman also wore on his head what looked like a bag of the same leather as the strips.

It is worth pointing out that this was one of the more subdued attires among the shaman-cooks.

Pushed and prodded, Eadam was forced to dance with the shamans, unfortunately, due to being a horse, one which walked upon no more than two hooves, there wasn’t much of a difference between his left and right hooves.

Rather than two left feet, you could say it was like having two right and left feet combined into a single pair. Really though, it couldn’t all just be blamed on his hooves. Eadam just generally had poor rhythm, it was part of why he could never get that far as a warrior.

Determining that Eadam was fairly useless as a dancer, and keeping him as such would likely lead to burnt meat, he had a bucket pushed to him. A bucket with a massive brush!

Baste the meat!” One shamaness cried.

Baste it!” A shaman cried.

Baste! Baste! Baste! Baste!” the cry went on and on.

Eadam understood well what he needed to do. Taking the brush in his hands, he struck the meat, basting it! In a moment, the meat changed, glittering shining, and wafting out a wondrous mouth watering smell which had not been there before. He continued until the meat was fully covered, and then he moved onwards.

Yet, he did not baste all the meats with the bucket he had been given. Nor did he baste them all with the same amount! Soon, his bucket was empty and it was switched out for another bucket.

It was not a dance he did, there was no rhythm, but there was that which is relatively rare in Elcon.


His movements were ordered!

After the basting he joined in on shamans that were chopping vegetables and other things.

The main kind of dish being made was one of the most common of elconic dishes. Stuffed food.

Stuffing meat with vegetables, vegetables with meat, meat with meat, vegetables with vegetables, and even creating recursions and of course using more than just mere meat and vegetable. There are of course many more things that can be devoured, and in a world such as Elcon, not only are there metals suitable for general consumption, there are even odder things.

Amid countless stuffed foods, and dancing shamans, amid fire and oils, and smokes and sauces…

Eadam saw something.

He saw a whole dimension of food. No… more than that.

It was a dimension filled with the concept of food. It was as if every dish, every recipe had its root in this world. No.

Not simply that.

It was constantly growing. Throughout many dimensions, people were constantly creating food, and each time they did, the dimension grew.

Did the inspiration come from this place, or was it born from people and flew off to this dimension?

A mere horse, even one from such a lunatic place as Elcon could scarcely hold the wholeness of a dimension in his head. Yet, it was a moment.

As that moment passed, that vision of the wealth of cooking of many dimensions faded away, Eadam began wildly grabbing food.

He stuffed.

First it was just putting one thing inside another thing…

But still he stuffed.

The food he was creating swelled.

He stuffed.

It began to rise of its own accord, as everyone knows, power tends to float.

He was creating a royal dish.

He did not cease to stuff.

In the end, the stuffed stuffing stuffed turned in on itself.

He stuffed it with itself.

He stuffed it so hard that it began to pulsate, as if the stuff it was made of was alive once more.

Such a thing would be very hard to serve up.

Indeed, if you didn’t carve it right, it would explode in a deadly mess of stuffed food!

As Eadam stood back in dazed admiration of his handiwork, a voice reached him.

Ohhh, not only a circus performer, but an amazing chef! Well, We can handle the rest. The cannon is ready for you.”

What?” Eadam questioned.

Author: SnowyMystic